When The Stars Go Blue
by Exhile87
Summary: Oneshot Squinoa fic. My take on the last scene of the game. Rinoa reflects on past events and wonders what the future holds...


**Author's Note: Yes, I know it's been ages since I've written anything, I'm really sorry! It's been more than a year since I've updated Guarded Terror, but I'm afraid that's on hold until I get my inspiration to continue it. Thanks to everyone who reviewed, and I'm really sorry I'll be taking a while to post a new chapter.**

**This is a one-shot fic I suddenly felt like writing while watching my sister play FFVIII. It's my take on the balcony scene at the end. It doesn't seem to go anywhere, which is fine by me since it's just going to be this one chapter. I guess I just wanted to write about the possible awkwardness between Rinoa and Squall after everything that's happened! The story will be in Rinoa's point of view.**

**The title of this story was adapted from a song originally sung by Ryan Adams, but covered beautifully by The Corrs. Hope you'll enjoy it!**

**(Edited: 13/20/07: Fixed some typos and layout.)  
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_"Where do you go when you're lonely?_

_I'll follow you… when the stars go blue…"_

_ -- When The Stars Go Blue --_  
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People say the stars are the suns of other galaxies, blazing ever brightly over the millions of miles in space, but as a child, I often thought they were a part of the clouds and the sky; maybe little bits of fluorescent paper that the Great Hyne decided She could decorate the night with just to make it look pretty. Even as I stood on the balcony of the airborne Balamb Garden, gazing at the vague line separating the dark horizon and the sky, I found myself considering — maybe it _was_ possible that the stars were just decorative ornaments of Hyne's. The events from the past few days — or were they weeks? I couldn't even remember — had made me realize one thing; nothing is impossible. Ever since my teenage years, I had grown up fighting for Timber's independence, but knowing, deep in my heart, that Timber was doomed never to be free. Timber's uprising against the Galbadians was almost as futile as my rebellion against my father. And yet, here I was, seventeen years of age, a _hero_, in the eyes of others, who had just returned from a victorious battle with Ultimecia— _and_ the celebration of the declaration of Timber's independence. That's right; the one thing which, years ago, seemed impossible and fruitless to achieve, just came about in a matter of days. I suppose maybe that was Galbadia's way of saying thanks to us for _'saving the world'_, as many people would call it.

I turned to look at the hall behind me. Even through the glass door separating the balcony and the party, the cheers and excited voices of the students and instructors were evident. Although it had been a few days since the end of the second Sorceress War, the celebration of our victory had not commenced until tonight. Selphie, being the main organiser of the event, had insisted that they all waited for my return from Timber before throwing the party. "After all," she had said. "Rinoa's one of us!"

_One of us…_ Strange how those three simple words could sum up the camaraderie and friendship we had all forged during the days. For the first time in my life, I felt as if I actually _belonged_ here. Sure, I wasn't a part of the others' 'Orphanage Gang', but I was at home with them there; I felt I could trust them all. To them, I wasn't _'Sorceress Rinoa',_ or _'the Sorceress of the era' _— I was just Rinoa, and I _wanted_ them to think that, nothing more.

I resumed my gaze at the twinkling stars, my hand, with a mind of its own, reaching up to my neck to touch my ring — well, _rings, _for now. I couldn't help the small smile on my face as I traced the gallant looking carving of Griever with my finger, remembering the first time I had learnt of it…

**_"It's a cool looking ring. What's this monster on it anyway?"_**

**_"It's not a monster. It's a lion. Lions are known for their great strength and pride."_**

**_"Hmm… Great strength… Pride… Kinda like you, Squall…"_**

**_"I wish…"_**

"I bet you do," I murmured to no one in particular, still rubbing the cool, somehow comforting surface of the ring. Just then, a low but strong, masculine voice broke the quiet atmosphere, making me jump involuntarily, "What're you talking about?"

I gave a short gasp, turning spontaneously to see him standing by the door, a gloved hand on the handle. He had his usual frown on his handsome face, only this time, there was a flicker of puzzlement on it as well. He silently closed the door and approached me, his grey eyes warm but a little curious. The familiar jingle of his belts and Gunblade at his hips was like music to my ears. I could close my eyes and listen to it all day. For a second there, I wondered why I hadn't heard him stepping onto the balcony…

"Sorry," he said a little sheepishly, taking his place by my side. "I didn't mean to startle you."

"It's… it's nothing. Don't worry about it," I replied.

We stood there for a while, silent but very much aware of each other's presence. I suddenly felt shy in front of him. It was as if the chemistry between us had suddenly moved onto a whole new level; a place I wasn't very familiar with. I bit my bottom lip and unconsciously tightened my grasp on the hard, cold stone railing before me.

"Why're you out here, Rinoa?" Squall asked quietly, a tint of concern in his voice. I wanted to merely smile at him. He seemed so… different… from when we first met. Sure, he remained a little stoic and still had that by-the-book attitude, but at least he appeared to be expressing more of his emotions.

"Shouldn't I be asking you the same question?" I countered playfully. His eyes moved to rest on mine and for a moment there, he seemed to hesitate a little.

"I was looking for you," he finally answered. "I couldn't find you inside and… well, I got a little worried, but Matron told me you were out here." There was a pause as he studied me without a word. "Is something wrong?" he questioned rather seriously.

I gave him an assuring grin and shrugged. "No, I was just thinking about… you know, everything that's happened lately…" I was surprised to hear him chuckle quietly, a tiny smile lingering on his lips. "You sure this conversation isn't supposed to be the other way around?" he uncharacteristically joked. I giggled, feeling a little more at ease. The humour had definitely lightened up the tense atmosphere, something I knew he was glad of too.

"Squall…" I started, keeping my gaze on the twinkling stars. He turned to me inquiringly, a hand on the hilt of his Gunblade. It was a habit of his, I noticed, although I had no idea why. Maybe he just wanted to have some sort of reassurance. "Have you ever thought about the future?"

He did not seem surprised at the question. "No," he mumbled. "Not really."

"Have you ever thought of having a family? I mean, you know, when you're older…"

"No."

"Why not?" I cocked my head to one side with a frown. His firm answer had piqued my interest. He nonchalantly shrugged and said, "I don't know. I guess it's because I can't remember anything about my own parents." He raised his eyebrows at me, adding, "What about you? Ever thought about it?"

"Of course." I smiled, my mind replaying the daydreams I used to have when I was younger. "I'd like to have a house by the beach… like, maybe somewhere in Dollet. My kids would be playing around on the beach, I'd be lying on my deck chair under the sun and he'd be grilling our lunch on the barbecue."

"_He_?" An eyebrow arched up higher.

"Yeah…" I said slowly, giving him a weird look. "I would like to think there's a _he_, at least…"

"So… who _is_ this… 'he', anyway?" he asked a little hesitantly. I suppressed the urge to giggle at his sudden seriousness. It was as if he didn't like the idea of there being _somebody else_.

"I don't know." I shrugged. "I guess I'll just have to wait and see."

He appeared strangely satisfied with my reply and resumed staring down the floating Garden, his eyes fixed on the dark blue ocean beneath us. Even so, I could feel his eyes on me every once in a while. I turned to look at him but he hastily averted his gaze. A squeaky, cheeky voice at the back of my mind told me maybe he was just a little shy…

"Squall," I broke the heavy silence again, this time wanting to ask him about something I had been thinking for a while. His grey eyes rose to lock on to my hazel ones. "What are we going to do?"

He frowned in puzzlement. "About what?"

"You know… about us…" My fingers nervously fondled the rings at my neck. His frown deepened. "What do you mean?"

"I _mean_…" I bit my bottom lip, not knowing exactly how to say it. "Where's this going? Where's — " I gestured back and forth towards him and me. " — _us_ going? Does our relationship even have a future? No matter what I keep telling myself, nothing can change the fact that you're a… and I'm…" As always, the painful truth was an agonizing stab to my heart. The thoughts came easily into my head, but forming them into words was always hard. _Is this how Squall feels?_

"That doesn't matter, Rinoa," he said in a low voice, quiet but firm. "You know it doesn't." _Rinoa_… I loved the way he said my name; soft and sweet like melting caramel yet melodious and spine tingling at the same time.

"Isn't it a little dangerous?" I softly said, fiddling with the rings at my neck. "I know we've dealt with Ultimecia, but you can't overlook the possibility that perhaps some people… I don't know, from the future again, maybe… might just get the same idea and try to… take control of me…"

"Then we'll deal with it when the time comes," he replied laconically. I peered at him in curiosity; it just wasn't like Squall not to worry about something — unless he was ordered to, of course… He kept his eyes on me, silent for a while. His following words were hesitant, maybe even a little anxious. Regardless, he subtly changed the subject, something I myself was secretly grateful for. "So you're returning to Timber tomorrow, huh?"

"Well…" I said slowly. "No, actually, I was going to drop by Deling City. My… father… said he wanted to talk about something…" I was a little surprised calling that man _father _didn't sound strange, after everything we had been through.

"And then you're going back to Timber?"

"Yeah, I suppose… unless…" I turned to look into his grey eyes, so full of secrets yet enticing at times. "Unless there's a reason for me not to…"

The expression on his face did not change, but his eyes clearly softened. He reached a gloved hand up to push away those gorgeous brown bangs from his sight. He shifted his gaze away for a moment, his jaw muscles tightening tensely, before turning back to me. His next reaction took me by surprise. Taking a step closer, he leaned down to me until our faces were mere inches apart, then stopped. I inhaled sharply, my heart racing as I gazed into his eyes, unsure of what he would do next. _Is he going to…?_

Squall reached out, hesitantly touching one of my hands on the stone railing. "Stay," he murmured. "Stay here… with me... Letting you go was the stupidest thing I've ever done, and after everything that's happened, I don't wanna do something I'd regret the rest of my life." He moved in a little closer. "I'm not losing you again, Rinoa," he said softly.

"But… Squall, what about… Everyone else will — "

"I don't _care_ about everyone else," he said bitterly. "I've said it before, Rinoa. Even if the whole world becomes your enemy, I'll still be your knight. No matter what happens, _I'll_ be beside you." He paused to look away for a while. "… Isn't that enough?" The question was said under his breath, almost as if he was pleading, begging…

What could I say? For practically the first time in my life, I was speechless. I opened my mouth but no words poured out. He was waiting expectantly for my answer, but I didn't know what to say. I could smell him — leather, sweat and that sweet-smelling cologne he always wore. Maybe it was that, or maybe it was simply because he was so close to me I ached to fall into his arms, but the next thing I did seemed impulsive, although I wasn't very surprised at myself.

I closed my eyes and leaned in towards him, pressing my lips against his. Kissing him for the first time felt surreal — surreal but exciting and electrifying as well. It felt so right… as if we _were_ meant to kiss tonight. We broke off tentatively and stared into each other's eyes. My cheeks burnt; I must be blushing dreadfully. I realised that my hands were already resting on his broad chest — how, I had no idea. I wanted to search his handsome face for any signs of regret, but his mouth came crashing down to mine once more as he pulled me towards him. He kissed me with a hungry passion; a total difference from our previous hesitance. I reached up to circle my arms around his neck, my fingers lightly raking his soft brown hair. My body pressed up against his and I could feel the heat radiating from underneath his clothes. His gloved hand caressed my neck gently; a contrast to our fiery, passionate kisses. I never wanted to let him go…

When we did break off again to take in much needed gulps of air, once more, we looked at each other for a moment, as if trying to sort out the emotions rushing through our entwined souls. I gave him another kiss — I couldn't help it — and then buried my face in his fur-collared jacket, suddenly overwhelmed with melancholy. He rested his hands at my waist, his chin on my head. I could almost hear his heart thumping against his chest. I felt secured, protected; just like the first time I was in his arms… the first time I knew he felt something for me…

"I wanna be with you, Squall," I blurted, despite my earlier reluctance. "Like this, forever… I don't want anything to change…" I bit my lip in uncertainty before continuing, "We'll find a way, won't we?"

He tightened his embrace, almost as if he was afraid I was going to run away. "Yeah," he whispered into my ear. "Yeah, we'll think of something…"

"I mean, there _has_ to be a something, right?" _… Isn't there?_

"Nothing is impossible, Rinoa…" His words rang true in my mind, making me relax a little. Inwardly, I wanted to giggle at my scepticism. Just minutes before I had come to that very conclusion myself, and yet, there I was, doubting the one thing I had realized and had started to believe in.

"Thank you," I mumbled, inhaling his scent.

"For what?" He seemed puzzled.

"For being there for me…" I gently pulled away and smiled at him. He was still wearing that serious expression of his. "And for being _you_, Squall," I added with a chuckle. He appeared boyishly pleased with what I'd said, but clearly tried to hide his feelings as he stiffly shrugged and turned his attention to the sky. _He's so cute sometimes…_

We spent the rest of the evening together on the balcony, gazing into the dark night. A warm breeze blew, bringing along the salty smell of the sea. It almost seemed like Hyne Herself was trying her best to make the night as romantic for us as possible. I had the urge to laugh at such a ridiculous thought.

I suddenly caught sight of a streak of bright light blazing across the sky. It was quick, but there was no doubt it was a shooting star. I turned to Squall to see him looking at the sky as well, a hint of a smile on his lips. His grey eyes rested on me. I raised a finger and pointed upwards the same way I did on that fateful day some time ago.

Only this time, he smiled back.

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**Hope you liked it. It'd be nice if you could review… XD**


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